Yesterday I wrote about my biological father…he was my father, but he wasn’t much of a dad. Today I want to recognize and express my gratitude to the man who was more of a dad to me than my father ever was. My mom married Herald when I was maybe 19 years old. He was, and is, such a good man…honest, reliable, compassionate, giving, fun to be around, wise and most of all, he loved my mom in a way in which she’d never been loved before. For that alone, I’d be forever grateful to him.
Herald and Mom had so much fun together…they traveled all over the country square dancing (I know, it sounds boring but they thoroughly enjoyed themselves), they’d go out on the motorcycle, work together in the yard and garden, took up wood working together, took trips that I know my mom never imagined she’d be able to take (Hawaii, I think, was probably her favorite). They brought so much joy into one another’s lives, it was such a good marriage for both of them.
Our families blended seamlessly…we had cook outs and holiday get togethers, we all got along and enjoyed spending time together. All of the grandchildren were loved by both of their grandparents. All the grandkids were treated the same by both Mom and Herald, loved equally. And I know the grandkids loved both of them too.
Herald taught me to drive a car with a stick shift…and he didn’t get mad when I killed it a million times. He helped me find a car when I needed a new one, taught me some of the basics of car care and house repair and upkeep. He didn’t have to do those things for me, but I’m so thankful that he did. He may not realize it, but he also taught me about honesty and committment. When my mom got so sick, he was there with her the entire time. He could have easily walked out, but that wasn’t the kind of man he was. I learned more about what constitutes a good man, a decent human being, by observing Herald than I ever could have learned from my own father.
When my mom died, Herald was the one who told each of us about it. Even in his grief, he had the compassion to offer us comfort. He told me that he had promised my mom he’d be there for us, and he was. Sometimes step-dad has a negative connotation, but I don’t see it that way at all. I feel privileged to be able to call Herald my step-dad. Happy Father’s Day, Herald. I love you.
- Happy Father’s Day, Mom (dontforgetyourjacket.com)
- Dads Rock (stakacsrealtor.wordpress.com)
Filed under: family, gratitude, life | Tagged: Family, Father, fathers day, Home, Parenting, Stepfamily | 8 Comments »
