Labor Day, 2013

Labor Day Parade, Union Square, New York, 1882...

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Today, despite country-wide protests from workers, President Palin signed an executive order which effectively changes the meaning of Labor Day.  From this day forward, anyone in the work force who earns less than $100,000 per year will be required to work on Labor Day for no compensation.  The president explained her decision about this change…”There are too many people in our great country who are leeches, don’t you know?  It’s time for the people who have been standing around with their hands out expecting businesses to just give them, you know, things like money when they really aren’t doing anything all that special to earn that money, it’s time for those people to help our county by working one day for free.  That money will be put to better use if we allow the wealthy and big businesses to do whatever they want with it.  Our country has always been about business and making money, not about taking care of the poor.  If you remember your history lessons, you’ll remember it was Paul Revere who made the first silver dollar right after he rang the Liberty Bell and  told the British invaders that we had guns and weren’t afraid to use them.  So if  Paul Revere could make money, why can’t all these other people go out there and do the same thing?  This is America, people.  Wake up!  Labor Day is about business, it always has been.  And business is like Paul Revere, interested in making money.  So we will help those businesses make money.  All of those people who have been taking and taking are now going to have to give some back.  That’s what America is about. ”  (wink, wink)

On a side note, when reporters asked President Palin to explain her desire to invade Canada, she replied, “Now you liberal, do-gooders in the media don’t want to talk about this, but you know that there are a lot of terrorists hiding out in Canada.  You might not believe it, but it’s true, just ask my good buddy, Vice President Dick Cheney.”

Bzzt, bzzt, bzzt…is that my alarm? What day is this?  What year is it?  Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, it’s 2011…what a nightmare…

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2 Responses

  1. That’ll teach you to fall asleep!

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